Wow.. another year. Im 24 now, God I feel so old reaching 24, cuz its so close to 25th.
25th was my last "Target" to get married, which I think is impossible to reach now. So i'll miss my target again hehehe. people say when u reach 25, the next thing u'll be 28, time goes fast when ur that old. I just hope it would be a lot fun and filled with good experiences and lots to learn. I want to thank Jesus for giving me another year, eventho i feel this year is quite tough im sure everything will be good in HIS time..

In this bday, I just wish I would be much stronger and wiser. I wanna keep my immaturity in certain parts (I still want to watch cartoons, manga, comics, playing online games, I dont think i want to stop on that), I want to be more patient as a person, I want to be much and much more confident.. gosh I know how much my confidence troubles me.. I want to really know what i want, get a bit of a pic on how to achieve it and be confident about it and the braveness to accept the fact if it doesnt happen, it still be ok.. and I will have the courage and patient to try and do it all over again. I want to take step more carefully and make decision wisely, I know sometimes i take so much time and too very careful on doing something, but its because I want to try to always do the right thing without hurting anyone. But I also want to be able to be spontaneous and not to over kill on thinking and flexible on it. I want to be smarter on things.

In this age, I have more and more responsibility to myself, family,bf and others. things are more complicated than I thought. when I was young, I thought things would be much more simple these age, things would be more stable. I was wrong. (we were all wrong, arent we put?)
in this bday, I feel so lonely, I havent find someone who I can really feel she/he/they can be my bestfriend, who i can trust, who i can tell all my stories. Im still worried of what theyre going to think and I wouldnt want them to think the way I would think they would. cuz its not that simple. and I simply feel "alone".

I have fearness that I still dont know how to deal, it keeps happening but somehow its still "new" for me. I really hope it wouldnt happen to me, if it does, I would want God to show it to me like he always been. By that time Im gona pray my serenity prayer to God.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next.Amen.

I hope ive mentioned everything.

NB: Thank u for rick that has posted a happy bday post on his blog for me
and thanks for friends who have posted bday comments on fs and myspace too, and as well to friends who have texted me. APPRECIATE IT =) much love for you guys. muachs